What’s A Caregiver

I’m really thankful for my current caregiver Q. She’s always on time and if she’s running late or can’t make it, she will call or text early enough to find someone else. Q knows how I like my hair fixed, how I like my clothes, make-up and even how I like my sausage cooked.

If something was off with me, Q would know because we’ve been together the pass two and a half years.

With this being said, can someone explain to me how caregivers of a woman in a vegetative state didn’t know she was pregnant? A woman who had been in a Phoenix nursing facility, whom had been in there for twenty-seven years, gave birth to a healthy baby in December.  How does the staff continue to say, they had no idea she was expecting?  For nine months, this woman’s body must have gone through some serious changes. If she was being properly taken care of, wouldn’t you think someone would’ve noticed; especially her caregivers?

I’m puzzled.  If a person is in a vegetative state, this means he or she can’t do anything for their self, which would leave a person at the mercy of one who usually has the title of caregiver.

A licensed practical nurse was charged and arrested in the Phoenix’s case, and a doctor was fired, along with another doctor resigning. I still want to know why the woman’s caregivers never saw a physical change.


When someone has a caregiver, a bond forms. Some bonds are good and others are bad. Caregiving is not a job for everyone. It takes a person with a compassionate heart to be a “good” caregiver. You don’t have to possess this quality, but when one looks at caregiving as just a job, it makes my life a bit difficult because he or she cares more about the money than me.

What makes a good caregiver in my opinion is when you have a good attitude, you’re fun, not an authoritarian, and you take good care of me as you would yourself or love ones. Another good quality of a caregiver is, when you notice when something is not right with me that could cause me harm.

Q does many personal tasks for me daily and notices everything without me saying a word. Although she’s my caregiver, we’ve become friends. You really can’t help from becoming friends with your caregiver unless he or she doesn’t want to or you just don’t click.

If you don’t have these qualities, perhaps caregiving is not for you. I would whether feel as if the person who’s assisting has my best interest at heart than just a part of their paycheck.

6 comments on “What’s A Caregiver

  1. Debbie on

    I saw that story and thought the same questions. There would have been signs. I am so glad you have someone special in your life to help you. Thank you for all that you bring to our lives.

  2. Marty ODell on

    I don’t believe that woman had caregivers. She may have had people providing for the barest of necessities, but not providing care. A caregiver would have seen, and spoken. Anyone who had anything to do with that poor woman should have fired on the spot.

    • Shari Cooper on

      You’re right Marty,
      This women probably didn’t have a caregiver but there should’ve been someone looking out for her. It’s a sad situation that gets me heated.

  3. Mel on

    Shari, I’m so glad you have a consistent, quality caregiver. When I heard about this story, I also wondered where this poor woman’s family were all that time? It’s disgusting and sad that someone so utterly defenseless had no one watching out for her.

    • Shari Cooper on

      Thanks Melissa,
      One does have to wonder, where and why this women’s family wasn’t looking out for her. Guess everyone’s family dynamics is different. Glad I have a good family and awesome friends I can count on!


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